July 21st, 2004
another month passed
well, it's been another month since i last posted. lots been happening but i dunno where to start. let's see if i can remember all that has happened.
rae came back....and we got back to the usual routine. shop, eat and talk. she really shopped a lot this time, though most of the time she spent shopping was inside guardian. she and suet li wanted to buy essentials which can amount to RM 100 ++. dunno wat they buy until so expensive also, i dun think i can spend that much in guardian.
results came out. i achieved everything except a HD, meaning i failed one subject. i expected to fail that paper only i had clung on to the hope that i'll pass. anyway, wat's done is done. dun wanna think of that again. all i can do now is to work harder and not slack anymore. surprisingly (or not), my dad didn't scold me. maybe i will feel better if he had scolded me instead of not really saying anything about it.
classes started this week. dunno why but i have been looking forward to attending classes since last sunday. maybe cos i was bored with the holidays. din do anything or go anywhere except stay at home and rot by watching tv all day long. but at least i got to learn to play mahjong (my dad taught me)
these days, i wasn't feeling as high / happy as i used to be. might be due to the current situation that i'm in. since the last 4 days, i've been answering a lot of questions with "i dunno". it's not that i purposely wan to answer that but i seriously have no answer to the questions. i've been thinking a lot for a long time to get an answer but i can't seem to get one. someone told me that i'm thinking too much of things that don't need thinking in the first place.
that was one of the questions that i wanted answers from myself. the other one is should i feel guilty of things that to me, it's my fault but to the other person and most other ppl, it's not mine. i dun wan to feel guilty but i can't help it. but is guilt overiding wat i really feel? i dun wan to hurt anyone anymore but i dunno wat am i to do.
been receiving advice and counselling from min, calvin and even merv but even after that, i still dunno wat to do. right now, i'm really confused on wat i am supposed to do? is there ever a right thing to do without hurting anybody?
rae came back....and we got back to the usual routine. shop, eat and talk. she really shopped a lot this time, though most of the time she spent shopping was inside guardian. she and suet li wanted to buy essentials which can amount to RM 100 ++. dunno wat they buy until so expensive also, i dun think i can spend that much in guardian.
results came out. i achieved everything except a HD, meaning i failed one subject. i expected to fail that paper only i had clung on to the hope that i'll pass. anyway, wat's done is done. dun wanna think of that again. all i can do now is to work harder and not slack anymore. surprisingly (or not), my dad didn't scold me. maybe i will feel better if he had scolded me instead of not really saying anything about it.
classes started this week. dunno why but i have been looking forward to attending classes since last sunday. maybe cos i was bored with the holidays. din do anything or go anywhere except stay at home and rot by watching tv all day long. but at least i got to learn to play mahjong (my dad taught me)
these days, i wasn't feeling as high / happy as i used to be. might be due to the current situation that i'm in. since the last 4 days, i've been answering a lot of questions with "i dunno". it's not that i purposely wan to answer that but i seriously have no answer to the questions. i've been thinking a lot for a long time to get an answer but i can't seem to get one. someone told me that i'm thinking too much of things that don't need thinking in the first place.
that was one of the questions that i wanted answers from myself. the other one is should i feel guilty of things that to me, it's my fault but to the other person and most other ppl, it's not mine. i dun wan to feel guilty but i can't help it. but is guilt overiding wat i really feel? i dun wan to hurt anyone anymore but i dunno wat am i to do.
been receiving advice and counselling from min, calvin and even merv but even after that, i still dunno wat to do. right now, i'm really confused on wat i am supposed to do? is there ever a right thing to do without hurting anybody?
